i had a terrible day.

it all started with someone.
he's like a ghost.
its been months of hearing his name, and i finally saw him for the first real time smiling at me.
and after that is just him appearing and disappearing infront of me.
im irritated.
n someone think i like him and will blush should i be around him.
do u even see me smiling hard then or staring at him like im crazy?
well, whatever, someone is starting to get on my nerve.
in my eyes, he has always been the invisible man.


plus, fucking bad encounter today.
yet i had to keep my cool.
thanks for ruining my day u fuckkkker.
i hope u drive n crash n die.
karma will play bitch back.
its hard to be looking at the people u cant stand or somebody screaming at u and u have to work for them.
i cant do it for the first time,but i cant lose my cool.
i dont care should i get any complaint about me.
put in the papers, whatever la.
beside ive been getting too much attention, so a little more publicity shouldnt be any issue for me.
besides, it was not my fault.


all the screaming just bring back all the trauma.
of being humiliated and embarrassed when u done nothing wrong.
i came home, my hand felt so numb.
i guess my blood pressure just shoot up.
but god knows im stronger than this.
i can smile and laugh yet i feel so numb.
and i guess there's something abt today that literally bring me back to memory lane.

though going out awhile really made my day.
i didnt want any companion, all i know is the person i meet there, is /are and will be my companion.


the person i thought was my friend isnt who i thought she was.
i dont feel like going out with her. anymore.
even with my messy attire, or heck care attitude like u said which i show sooo well.
i still get people trying to get my attention.
what about u?
all the people u said all have a thing for me.
i am dumb, but im not blind.
u have nothing, but a dumb fucking loser whom u are fucking obsessed with.
nb nb cb.

i dont like to talk like this.
and im not being arrogant of anything.
all i know is i shouldnt and cant do what i shouldnt and i wont.
all i know that in life u just have to try and keep going.
i know everything that happened is inevitable.
i learnt the most hardest and painful lessons.
where i died n revived back.
and im never going back.
whatever that happened to u is nothing.
just nothing.

the person im with now, is the person i want be with for the rest of my life.
i said it now, and again, and whenever i feel like it.
cause i know this feeling is forever.
no one can make me feel he way does.
i dont want anybody attention but just his.
i dont care if im foolish, its just who i am.


im in a bad mood.
i feel like taking medical tomorrow.
cause i see a long and sleepless night without my painkillers.
cb.
n im feeling rebellious cause i dont want any painkillers.

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